Tag Archives: sandwich

Your Cheese Is Sweating

My town has one of the most interesting sandwich shops in existence. If there were logical rules by which sandwich shops should abide, it would defy most of them.

The first time I went there, the owners were advertising a special sandwich on a huge poster on the front door. When I asked for the special sandwich, they said that it wasn’t available. I asked them why they were advertising a sandwich that they didn’t have, and they stared at me blankly.

I figured I would just order something else. I saw a hot breakfast sandwich on the menu that looked good, so I ordered that instead. They told me it was no longer offered, and they had inadvertently left it on the menu.

The second time I went to the sandwich shop, I was really craving a toasted panini. They explained to me that they had no working toaster oven, and they were out of ciabatta bread.

The third time I went in there (I can’t believe I’m actually admitting that I went back a third time), I immediately got blasted by hot air, after pushing open the front door. Apparently they fixed the toaster oven. What they didn’t fix was the thermostat and the central air. On a warm day, the temperature inside the sandwich shop was significantly higher than the temperature outside.

I went up to the counter and saw what appeared to be a bunch of ailing condiments, waiting for death. I couldn’t help myself from making a comment to the owner standing there. I said “I’m sorry, but it’s like a thousand degrees in here, and your mayo looks sick.” He responded “It’s fine. We keep it cooler behind the counter.” I leaned over the counter, pointed at the slices of cheddar, and replied “Really? Then why is your cheese sweating?”

Another patron in line behind me broke out in laughter. The owner seemed uneasy. I cheerfully remarked “Thanks, but I don’t want any sweaty cheese.”

I haven’t gone back since. I swear.


Have you had any interesting food experiences?



Filed under Stories from the Stomach