Conversay-what?!

For those of you who read my last post about conversational challenges during get-togethers, I suppose you can consider this a Part Deux.

As you know, since my husband and I only have cats and dogs, we give partygoers more of a challenge when it comes to conversations. We have started seeing similarities and patterns in what people will talk to us about when they find out we don’t have “real” kids (you know, like the homo sapien kind). Most times, discussions end up revolving around our careers, our pets, or the weather.

Over the years, we’ve gotten some truly disturbing interesting comments and questions about pets.

Here are some of the most memorable:

  • “My cat uses a toilet. I can’t get over the idea that I share a toilet with him, though. I still get startled when I walk into the bathroom in the middle of the night and find him sitting there.”

EXCUSE ME, CAN I GET SOME PRIVACY HERE?!
Courtesy of http://muppet.wikia.com/

  • “Pets are more work than kids sometimes. You can’t just take them with you on trips, because they’re not good travelers. I mean, they can’t even roll their own suitcase.”
  • “My ex-girlfriend’s mom used to have a dog. She used to clean the dog’s butt by dabbing it with a tissue after he went to the bathroom. Gave that poor dog a complex. Now he can’t even look at a box of Kleenex.”

OH NO, NOT A KLEENEX COSTUME! SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE IT STOP!
Courtesy of http://www.arlingtonva.us/

  • “All this talk about chocolate being bad for your dog. Bah! I gave my dog M&M’s all the time. He loved them. What? No, he’s not alive anymore.”
  • “I used to have a dog. Poor thing got killed in a car accident. At least it wasn’t a hit and run. My dumbass neighbor ran him over while backing out of his driveway.”
  • “Can you imagine if we ran around like cats and dogs all day long? Dear Lord, we’d never get anything done at work. We’d be too busy tail-chasing, napping at our desk, and looking for random scraps of food. Wow, come to think of it, we’d be just like that guy in Accounting!”
  • “I love cats and dogs. They’re delicious. I’m just kidding. I’ve never eaten a cat.”

HEY, WHAT HAPPENED TO TUCSON?!
Courtesy of http://bayhorsedesigns.com/

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7 Comments

Filed under Furry Tales

7 responses to “Conversay-what?!

  1. I have so much I want to say that I can’t bring myself to say anything.

  2. So hilarious. Especially wiping the dog’s tush.

  3. An old roommate used to clean her dog’s butt with a tissue, too. I thought maybe she was the only one.

    • Really?! And here I thought the lady I knew was the only one! Every time he saw her with Kleenex, he started running! Poor dog had serious issues from the tissues! 😉

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